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If you haven’t guessed by the name of the domain, I’m Stef Dawson and this is my corner of cyberspace dedicated to all things random. I’m gullible, in debt, desire h0t s:Ex with dr!pping teENa ger Hailey, won't pull women unless I lose my beer gut, and my vices are BBW in my neighbourhood, compulsive dieting, curvy latinos, and Tramadol … or so the spam companies appear to think. I’m also a bit cunning. That’s me over there. No, not that way, that picture over there. How many people look like that who aren’t in the loony bin?

At the moment I’m too lazy to finish the site. Not that a website should ever be deemed ‘finished’ per se, but at the very least it should have content worthy of reading, and perhaps a smattering of tits and ass. Ergo, with it somewhat lacking on both these counts, this site is labelled Work In Progress and is subject to change that could par-broil the fabric of time.

In case you’re the sort of person that twitches like MC Hammer's trousers if you don’t tweet every 8 minutes to show your friends how exciting you are, check out the latest happenings to prove just how glacial my site updates are. Alternatively you could get recented up on:

Play Crouching Badger, Hidden Terror Mashup the title of the rubbish film Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon to improve it.Plugsmd_prognostics Ever been hacked or had your Textpattern files compromised by a rogue script or attacker? Keep tabs on your precious file system with smd_prognositcs which monitors your… PostElection 2017: the clear winners are us Ha ha ha ha ha ha haaaaa. That’s me laughing at the cocksure Conservatives who have given the UK another hung parliament. Which is actually fantastic news.

You might also enjoy the blog post entitled The ebook revelation, but there’s always the possibility you think it both sucks and blows. For those who crave even more immediacy you can find me on Google+, Facebook or you can join the socialites awaiting my first utterance on Twatter.

If you’re in any way dissatisfied with what’s going on amid these bytes, feel free to send me an email and I’ll either send you back an estimate of when I’ll get this site firing on more than one cylinder1 or point at your face and laugh.

1 fineprint: One estimate per customer. Management reserve the right for the estimate to be within three parsecs (plus or minus) of the actual time the site works properly. No correspondence (after the initial correspondence of course) will be entered into. English teachers please forgive the last sentence ending with a preposition. Calls cost no more than thruppence a second and last for a week. Calls may be monitored for training porpoises. The editor’s decision is unanimous and his own, so ner.