Y'know things that are all the rage? Blogs. Everyone has one; or at least had one before Facebook, Twitter et al diluted the realtime pool.
Since I'm nu-old skool — and watching endless streams of people validate their own self-importance is stupefyingly pointless — I figured why not make a blog? The main difference here compared with other people's blogs is that instead of being limited to one topic, you get a little slice of everything all mashed up. I'm too good to be tweeting.
N.B. The views expressed herein are not my own: they have been carefully shaped by a barrage of mainstream media propaganda and fill-in-the-blanks guesswork. Also, I'm prone to lying for the sake of entertainment.
- · 310 words (munches about 2 mins)
Help! The government can’t locate me in a photo so I won’t be able to travel anywhere until they do.
- · 298 words (sucks up about 2 mins)
Oi, Apple! When I set some user preferences, have the decency to honour them because it’s my choice, not yours.
- · 1114 words (kills about 5 mins)
Time for a change of career. Forget making money the old fashioned way doing things I enjoy. I’m going to sell software to schools and governments. They’ll buy anything.
- · 827 words (devours about 4 mins)
Unlocking your phone with a passphrase, password or pattern takes time. Using your thumbprint is virtually instantaneous, and it’s guaranteed to belong to you, right? Wrong.
- · 712 words (vacuums up about 4 mins)
The hashtag: the cornerstone of social media. Trends. Analytics. Fun. But I sometimes wonder if certain entities understand what it’s actually for.
- · 2140 words (wastes about 10 mins)
We’re told the NHS is in crisis and needs funding. Let’s step back a moment and find out if it’s true and who’s to blame. The answer might surprise you.
- · 1508 words (eats up about 7 mins)
Gimme an ‘L’. Gimme a ‘G’. Gimme a ‘B’. Gimme a… ‘T’… ‘I’… ‘A’… WTF? I can’t keep up.
- · 1480 words (kills about 7 mins)
When your boiler’s broke. And your water’s cold. Who you gonna call? Ghostbusters? A heating engineer? Or someone with a soldering iron and dogged determination?