Shhh badger-welcome

c: 02 Mar 2009 00:05 | m: 27 Mar 2013 11:47 | f: /

If you haven’t guessed by the name of the domain, I’m Stef Dawson and this is my corner of cyberspace dedicated to all things random. I’m massively overweight, unable to get an erection, love to watch my p3n!s grow daily until it becomes so large it presumably shreds, may never walk again if I don't forward this to 25 people in the next 9 seconds, and my vices are cheap medication, college nymphs, compulsive dieting, and poker … or so the spam companies appear to think. I’m also a bit strange. That’s me over there. No, not that way, that picture over there. How many people look like that who aren’t in the loony bin?

At the moment I’m too lazy to finish the site. Not that a website should ever be deemed ‘finished’ per se, but at the very least it should have content worthy of reading, and perhaps a chocolate dispenser. Ergo, with it somewhat lacking on both these counts, this site is labelled Work In Progress and is subject to change that could stretch your favourite jumper.

In case you’re the sort of person that twitches like a cock-starved nymphomaniac if you don’t tweet every 8 minutes to show your friends how exciting you are, check out the latest happenings to prove just how glacial my site updates are. Alternatively you could be awed by such recentness as:

Play Random school report generator Try your hand at creating a school report using state of the art StefDawsonology. Plug smd_wrap Wrap stuff with stuff. Most Txp tags come with built-in wraptag/class/break attributes but if they don't, or you want to conditionally display content that may be optiona… Post We can't connect to Outlook Ever since Micro$oft forced “new Outlook” on everybody to replace Hotmail, users have been plagued with daily connection issues. The company maintain it’s not their fault.

You might also enjoy the blog post entitled Lakeland: world of pointless, but there’s always the possibility you think it sucks. For those who crave even more social bandwagonity you can find me on Google+, Facebook or you can join the 79 disciples awaiting my first utterance on Twatter.

If you’re in any way dissatisfied with what’s going on amid these bytes, feel free to send me an email and I’ll either send you back an estimate of when I’ll get this site firing on more than one cylinder1 or point at your Christmas jumper and laugh.

1 fineprint: One estimate per customer. Management reserve the right for the estimate to be within three parsecs (plus or minus) of the actual time the site works properly. No correspondence (after the initial correspondence of course) will be entered into. English teachers please forgive the last sentence ending with a preposition. Calls cost no more than thruppence a second and last for a week. Calls may be monitored for training porpoises. The editor’s decision is unanimous and his own, so ner.

Nipply Stef

Even from this angle, Stef's pec is almost visible