c: | m:

Y'know things that are all the rage? Blogs. Everyone has one; or at least had one before Facebook, Twitter and Google+ diluted the realtime pool.

Since I'm nu-old skool — and watching endless streams of people writing #incomprehensible #twaddle u n me l8r lol @knickerlicker is stupefyingly pointless — I figured why not make a blog? The main difference here compared with other people's blogs is that instead of being limited to one topic, you get a little slice of everything all mashed up. I'm too good to be tweeting.

N.B. The views expressed herein are not my own: they have been carefully shaped by a barrage of mainstream media propaganda and fill-in-the-blanks guesswork. Also, I'm prone to lying for the sake of entertainment.

  • Targeted ads have a long way to go in the semantic web

    · 680 words (laps up about 4 mins)

    Personalised banner advertising on the Internet is an utter waste of money, effort and bandwidth because the industry have made some fundamentally wrong decisions about what constitutes useful metadata.

  • Desperation in spam world

    · 305 words (kills about 2 mins)

    It’s official, spam companies are getting desperate to attract people’s attention in order to sell products. Just look at these subject lines.

  • Mobile devices make it easy to hack passwords

    · 865 words (vacuums up about 4 mins)

    If you use your mobile phone or tablet for any kind of Internet application that requires authentication — Facebook, Twitter or online banking, for example — you’re setting yourself up to get hacked.

  • Hi, my name is

    · 334 words (laps up about 2 mins)

    Would a rose by any other name smell as sweet? Clearly in the world of rap, the answer is yes. Uhhh, would the real Slim Shady please stand up. We’re gonna have a little problem here.

  • The right actor for the job

    · 376 words (devours about 2 mins)

    After all these years of being an avid movie follower, why did I assume there was a rigorous accreditation procedure at Casting Director University?

  • New Year's Evolution

    · 161 words (eats up less than a minute)

    All hail 2014. A New Year has begun, whereby people the world over decree they are going to improve their lifestyle and turn over a new leaf. All except me.